You can't make this stuff up!

[fbibob]

A burglar who broke into a home just east of Fresno rubbed food seasoning over the body of one of two men as they slept in their rooms and then used an 8-inch sausage to whack the other man on the face and head before running out of the house, Fresno County sheriff's deputies said Saturday.

Lt. Ian Burrimond, describing the crime as one of the strangest he's ever heard of, said a suspect was found hiding in a nearby field a few minutes later and taken into custody on suspicion of residential robbery.

Deputies, he said, had no problem linking the suspect to the crime.
Antonio Vasquez Jr.

"It seems the guy ran out of the house wearing only a T-shirt, boxer shorts and socks, leaving behind his wallet with his ID," Burrimond said.

Arrested was Antonio Vasquez Jr., 21, of Fresno.

Burrimond said deputies headed to the victims' home in the 300 block of South Thompson Avenue near Kings Canyon Road shortly after 8 a.m. Saturday regarding a burglary in progress.

The victims, both farmworkers, told deputies they were awakened by a stranger applying "Pappy's Seasoning" to one of them and striking the other with a sausage.

Both the spices and the sausage, Burrimond said, reportedly were obtained from the victims' kitchen.

After the man fled, the victims discovered the home had been ransacked and that some money was taken, Burrimond said.

Burrimond said the money was recovered, but that the piece of sausage used in the attack was discarded by the suspect and eaten by a dog.

"That's right, the dog ate the weapon," Burrimond said.

"I tell you, this was one weird case."

[Sveta's Hero]

Last week, in Texas I believe, a man in a wheelchair robbed a 7-11 store. He made his get-away rolling out the door and down the street.
All he took were 10 boxes of condoms and an energy drink.:lol::lol::lol:

True story.:lol:

[krevedko]

:rolling: :becky::becky:

[fbibob]

MELBOURNE: Scientists have discovered that going veggie could be bad for your brain-with those on a meat-free diet six times more likely to suffer brain shrinkage.

Vegans and vegetarians are the most likely to be deficient because the best sources of the vitamin are meat, particularly liver, milk and fish. Vitamin B12 deficiency can also cause anaemia and inflammation of the nervous system. Yeast extracts are one of the few vegetarian foods which provide good levels of the vitamin.

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/HealthSci/Eating_veggies_shrinks_the_brain/articleshow/3480629.cms

[fbibob]

This one is NOT humor, but still hard to believe.

FOUR teenagers were horrifically slain by Satanists — stabbed 666 times each and then EATEN.

The gang of Devil worshippers butchered their victims and roasted them on a bonfire before devouring their flesh.

Horrified cops found body parts dumped in a pit beside an upside-down cross, a symbol used in Satanic worship.


The victims all suffered 666 knife wounds — the number associated with the Beast, or Antichrist, and featured in horror films such as The Omen.

The pals, three girls and a boy aged 16 or 17, were all Goths.

They were lured one by one to a cottage and forced to get drunk before being butchered.

Hair from them was found in the embers of a fire the gang lit under a tree.

Police believe the teenagers were cooked in the flames before their flesh was devoured.

Their private parts had also been cut off in the sickening ritual in a rural area of Russia.


After police arrested eight suspected members of the ring, one boasted how they had previously dug up the grave of a newly-dead girl and eaten her heart.


Another said he did not expect to be punished, saying: “Satan will help me to avoid responsibility. I made lots of sacrifices to him.”


And a third said he had got fed up with God for not making him rich and that “things improved” after he started praying to the Devil.


The discovery in Yaroslavl, 300 miles from Moscow, sent a shudder across Russia — where Satanists are feared to have committed a string of mutilations and killings.
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article1692637.ece

[krevedko]

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/HealthSci/Eating_veggies_shrinks_the_brain/articleshow/3480629.cms

I've been eating liver for two days in a row and still have some left for tomorrow. When should I expect effects so as I could start making some increadibly intelligent posts on GoGabber? :becky:

[fbibob]

You are already doing well, IMHO. By the way, here is another wierd one.

Nyuki football club was losing to its local rivals Socozaki in Sunday's game when the club's goalkeeper decided to intervene.

Radio Okapi, a local broadcaster funded by the United Nations, said the player dashed up the pitch incanting "fetishist" spells to weaken the opposing team.

The game, a derby match in an eastern province of the Central African country, quickly broke up into a brawl between the two teams of players.

A local police commander then tried to intervene to break up the fight, but he was pelted with rocks by the crowd.

Matters quickly got out of hand as fighting seized hold of some sections of the stadium. Police fired canisters of tear gas and spectators stampeded for the exits.

The charge resulted in carnage: 11 dead and several others injured.

As is the case elsewhere in Africa, many Congolese hold traditional animist beliefs and use spells, fetishes and charms to practise witchcraft, often combined with other religions like Christianity or Islam.

Sunday's riot happened in Butembo, in North Kivu province, where fighting between the army and rebels has raged on despite the official end of a 1998-2003 war that has killed an estimated 5.4 million people through violence, hunger and disease.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/democraticrepublicofcongo/2962727/Eleven-dead-in-Congo-football-riot-after-use-of-witchcraft.html

[fbibob]

This one is a bit nicer.

PHOENIX (AP) - "Man's best friend" doesn't go far enough for Buddy—a German shepherd who remembered his training and saved his owner's life by calling 911 when the man had a seizure.
And it's not the first time Buddy has been there for owner Joe Stalnaker, a police officer said Sunday.

On a recording of the 911 call Wednesday, Buddy is heard whimpering and barking after the dispatcher answers and repeatedly asks if the caller needs help.

"Hello, this is 911. Hello ... Can you hear me? Is there somebody there you can give the phone to," says the dispatcher, Chris Trott.

Police were sent to Stalnaker's home, and after about three minutes Buddy is heard barking loudly when the officers arrived.

Scottsdale police Sgt. Mark Clark said Stalnaker spent two days in a hospital and recovered from the seizure.

"It's pretty incredible," Clark said. "Even the veteran dispatchers—they haven't heard of anything like this."

Clark said police are dispatched whenever 911 is called, but that Stalnaker's address was flagged in Scottsdale's system with a notification that a trained assistance dog could call 911 when the owner was incapacitated.

Clark said Stalnaker adopted Buddy at the age of 8 weeks from Michigan-based Paws with a Cause, which trains assistance dogs, and trained him to get the phone if he began to have seizure symptoms. Buddy, now 18 months old, is able to press programmed buttons until a 911 operator is on the line, Clark said.

Clark said Buddy has made two other 911 calls when Stalnaker was having seizures.

http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D9379GUG0&show_article=1

[statajack]

I've been eating liver for two days in a row and still have some left for tomorrow. When should I expect effects so as I could start making some increadibly intelligent posts on GoGabber? :becky:

Aha......liver, loaded with iron and the odd rubber tube.

Effects from over consumption -

1. Bathroom scales may scoot off the upper end of the scale.

2. You may develop a peripheral intestinal tract and other tubular accessories.

3. Some body parts may develop a glow-in-the-dark characteristic.

4. Vegetables will no longer be frightened of you or your cooker.

5. You may develop excessive muscle bulk, and possibly turn green on occasions.

6. The ability to sing a tuneful melody may diminish with time.

........... but the addition of onions and gravy to the daily liver intake have proven to eliminate these effects.

[krevedko]

I hope this is a list of options for me to select from.
So I would go for option 3:
3. Some body parts may develop a glow-in-the-dark characteristic.

Always wanted to have luminiscent boobies :becky::becky:

As for 6 (The ability to sing a tuneful melody may diminish with time.) - ROFL and LMAO :megalol:

If you ever heard me singing, you'd never thought of trying to scare me with this one :D
My singing was the real reason Scottish Bagpipers refused to attend the music festival in Moscow. They said they were never going to set feet in the city that could tolerate the fact that the worlds worst singer ever resides there. :becky:
I am banned from all karaoke's in Moscow and I only risk singing lullebies to my daugher on the occasions when she'd been really realy really naughty. :becky::becky:

[statajack]

I hope this is a list of options for me to select from.
So I would go for option 3:

Always wanted to have luminiscent boobies :becky::becky:

As for 6 (The ability to sing a tuneful melody may diminish with time.) - ROFL and LMAO :megalol:

If you ever heard me singing, you'd never thought of trying to scare me with this one :D
My singing was the real reason Scottish Bagpipers refused to attend the music festival in Moscow. They said they were never going to set feet in the city that could tolerate the fact that the worlds worst singer ever resides there. :becky:
I am banned from all karaoke's in Moscow and I only risk singing lullebies to my daugher on the occasions when she'd been really realy really naughty. :becky::becky:

Haha......... great !!

Yes on 3. - I quite fancy the idea of a luminous JT. That should create even more laughs than the usual. :becky:

[kompukovboichik]

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/HealthSci/Eating_veggies_shrinks_the_brain/articleshow/3480629.cms

anthropologists have known this for many years... it the advent of homo sapiens story... they start eating meat, develop a bigger brain and go on to dominate the world...

[Hoopy]

anthropologists have known this for many years... it the advent of homo sapiens story... they start eating meat, develop a bigger brain and go on to dominate the world...
Who do?anthropologists or homo sapiens :p

[fbibob]

anthropologists have known this for many years... it the advent of homo sapiens story... they start eating meat, develop a bigger brain and go on to dominate the world...

Then they starting quiche and soy products and their brains (and testicles) shrink.

[fbibob]

ROUND LAKE BEACH--A woman who hit her husband on the head with a hammer said she thought he was an alien, police said Friday.

Gabrielle Graffia, 51, of the 1000 block of Villa Vista Drive in Round Lake Beach was arrested and charged with aggravated battery with a deadly weapon for hitting husband Ronald Graffia with a hammer during an argument last weekend.

Deputy Police Chief Rich Chiarello said officers arrived at the address and found the two wrestling in front of the house.

While a motive is not clear, police said Gabrielle told authorities that "her husband was an alien and he was trying to kill her."

Ronald Graffia was treated for minor injuries.

"It was a bizarre case," Chiarello said. "However, it is an unfortunate one because this did not have to happen."

During a search of the house, investigators found evidence of prescription medication.

Gabrielle told police that she had been taking medications to treat a mental illness.

She is being in Lake County (Ill.) Jail undergoing psychological evaluation.

[kompukovboichik]

Who do?anthropologists or homo sapiens :p

the anthropologists of course! :lol:

[fbibob]

-- People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals sent a letter to Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, cofounders of Ben & Jerry's Homemade Inc., urging them to replace cow's milk they use in their ice cream products with human breast milk, according to a statement recently released by a PETA spokeswoman.

"PETA's request comes in the wake of news reports that a Swiss restaurant owner will begin purchasing breast milk from nursing mothers and substituting breast milk for 75 percent of the cow's milk in the food he serves," the statement says.

PETA officials say a move to human breast milk would lessen the suffering of dairy cows and their babies on factory farms and benefit human health.

http://www.wnbc.com/news/17539627/detail.html

[Voobrazheniye]

-- People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals sent a letter to Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, cofounders of Ben & Jerry's Homemade Inc., urging them to replace cow's milk they use in their ice cream products with human breast milk, according to a statement recently released by a PETA spokeswoman.

"PETA's request comes in the wake of news reports that a Swiss restaurant owner will begin purchasing breast milk from nursing mothers and substituting breast milk for 75 percent of the cow's milk in the food he serves," the statement says.

PETA officials say a move to human breast milk would lessen the suffering of dairy cows and their babies on factory farms and benefit human health.

http://www.wnbc.com/news/17539627/detail.html

Just think of the fun new flavors they could advertise!

[fbibob]

Like boob berry?

[fbibob]

Or Choco - tit.

[fbibob]

Or pine - nipple?

[foxy00]

hey maybe the robber was an ex lover, and wanted to show what real 8 inches looked like!!!

[fbibob]

Or Racky - road?

[fbibob]

Police arrest Mich. man for car wash vacuum sex
1 day ago

THOMAS TOWNSHIP, Mich. (AP) — Police say a Michigan man has been arrested after "receiving sexual favors from a vacuum" at a car wash.

The Saginaw News reports the 29-year-old Swan Creek Township man was arrested Thursday in Saginaw County's Thomas Township, about 90 miles northwest of Detroit.

Police Sgt. Gary Breidinger says a resident called to report suspicious activity at the car wash about 6:45 a.m. An officer approached on foot and caught the man in the act.

The suspect, whose name wasn't immediately released, is being held in the Saginaw County Jail.

[krevedko]

Bob, have you got any info re. his LL nickname (I'm sure he must be a member :becky:) so that us, good girls, could avoid him?

[Lucker]

Think of a very fat man with a mangy cat . I can say no more .

[fbibob]

Well, it is not me (I joined the bureau after Hoover.)

[fbibob]

You see, it's a play on words. Hoover was the famous director for the FBI, and is also a kind of vacuum, you see, and..........

never mind.



Here's another.


Security forces in Natanz have arrested two suspected "spy pigeons" near Iran's controversial uranium enrichment facility, the reformist Etemad Melli newspaper reported on Monday.
One of the pigeons was caught near a rose water production plant in the city of Kashan in Isfahan province, the report cited an unnamed informed source as saying, adding that some metal rings and invisible strings were attached to the bird.

"Early this month, a black pigeon was caught bearing a blue-coated metal ring, with invisible strings," the source was quoted as saying of the second pigeon.

The source gave no further description of the pigeons, neither their current status nor what their fate will be.

Natanz is home to Iran's heavily-bunkered underground uranium enrichment plant, which is not far from Kashan.

[fbibob]

(With White Sauce, I hope)

A Frenchman caused a two-hour train delay when his arm was sucked into a toilet as he tried to retrieve his dropped mobile phone.

The man had to be cut free after putting his arm down a train toilet in an attempt to retrieve his mobile phone
The 26-year-old passenger's arm became trapped up to the shoulder by the powerful suction flushing system on board the packed high-speed TGV train from Paris to La Rochelle.

Firefighters took more than an hour to free the man, before lifting him from the train on a stretcher with the entire toilet still stuck to his arm.

A fire spokesman said: "He was cut free from the toilet on the platform and apart from suffering bruising and smelling a bit, he suffered no other injuries."

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/3269082/Frenchman-delays-train-after-getting-arm-stuck-in-toilet.html

[fbibob]

A man awaiting a jury verdict in a San Anselmo auto theft case was arrested after police learned he had driven a stolen Lexus to the Marin County courthouse, authorities said.

The key informants in the case were a group of tiny Yorkshire terriers that escaped from the Lexus SUV, attracting the attention of bystanders at the Civic Center and leading sheriff's deputies to discover the stolen vehicle.

Tony Van, a 37-year-old hairstylist from San Francisco, was arraigned Monday on charges of receiving a stolen vehicle, receiving stolen property, animal cruelty and leaving animals in an unattended vehicle, said Deputy District Attorney Linda Witong.

Van was being held in lieu of $250,000 bail.

The incident occurred Friday, when Van was at the courthouse for his trial in a separate case. Van was charged with possession of a $125,000 Porsche Carrera that had been stolen from a residence in San Anselmo, said Deputy District Attorney Aicha Mievis.

While Van was in the courthouse awaiting the verdict, two Civic Center employees on a break noticed some loose Yorkies around a Lexus in the parking lot. As they gathered up the dogs, several puppies were found unattended inside the Lexus on the sweltering day. Authorities suspect some of the dogs jumped out a window.

Sheriff's deputies were summoned and discovered that the 2005 Lexus had been reported stolen. Then Van came out to the vehicle, with the keys in his possession, authorities said.

Deputies arrested Van and recovered a stolen computer and checkbook from the vehicle, according to court documents. The dogs - four adults and three puppies, all Yorkies or Maltese/Yorkshire mixes - were turned over to the Marin Humane Society.
Then Van's jury returned and convicted him in the case of the stolen Porsche. Sentencing is pending.

Van's lawyer, Deputy Public Defender Peter Arian, declined to comment on the new allegations.

The dogs are in good condition and are being held at the Marin Humane Society until further notice, said Capt. Cindy Machado.

"We're awaiting further word from the district attorney's office to see how we should proceed," she said.

Van told authorities the dogs belong to him.

"What was particularly disconcerting was that the dogs in the car were very, very young," Mievis said. "It appears that they were just a few days old."



http://www.marinij.com/sanrafael/ci_10830897